Meet our honoree, Rupa Kitchens! Rupa has been involved with GirlSpring since 2017, and served as board president from 2019-2023. During her term, GirlSpring quadrupled it's reach and greatly increased it's donor base, due in large part to Rupa's efforts. We are extremely grateful to her for all that she has done for GirlSpring and for her contributions to empowering girls!
The article below is from 2017, but it gives you a glimpse into why we think Rupa is so amazing!
Link to article >> https://birminghamhomeandgarden.com/wonder-women/
Rupa Kitchens
Urologist | Urology Centers of Alabama
Wife of Dave // Mom to Maya and Deven
Balance might be the one ideal we all strive for, but ask 10 different women what their idea of balance is, and you will get 10 very different answers. For urologist Rupa Kitchens, it means equal parts family, work, and social and community engagement. It seems that finding more than 24 hours in a day to do it all might be the one thing she hasn’t mastered yet.
Let’s talk about goals and success. What do those things look like to you?
I want what everybody else wants—to raise our children to be decent people who are independent and well-balanced. I also think you need to have fun. That’s why our family travels a lot—the only time we can really relax is when we get out of the city. We love our community and love being involved, but sometimes we have to get away.
What has been the biggest obstacle to achieving your goals?
Time. If I could survive on four hours of sleep, maybe I could get it all done.
Aside from being a practicing urologist, tell us what drives you.
So many things! My husband, Dave, and I are part of two groups at the Birmingham Museum of Art—the Indian Cultural Society and the Emerging Collectors Society. I am also on the board of GirlSpring, which is all about empowering young girls. These girls need to understand that they have the potential to go beyond what they might have been told they could do. GirlSpring gives them the resources to better talk with their peers and to develop relationships with mentors. They also have a web site, GirlSpring.com, where girls can read articles on topics like school, bullying, eating disorders, dating, and college.
What advice would you give your 15-year-old self?
I was really a perfectionist back then; everything had to be just right. But I am not like that anymore. Once you have kids, you realize you don’t have time to be like that! I did not relax as a 15-year-old, but now I see the rewards that relaxation brings. You have to reset your brain and recharge. I also should have spent more time with my parents. Back then I was in such a hurry to get out of the house!
How do you make quality time with your family?
We travel together. This summer, we are going to Peru and the Galapagos Islands. We’ve been to India on the last three Birmingham Museum of Art trips. We’ve also been to Africa three times and to South America. My daughter Maya and I have enjoyed being in an Indian classical folk fusion group for about 10 years now. We practice every week and have performances all the time, both in town and out of town. There are about 40 members, and we range in age from little kids to mid-50s. And it’s not just Indians! We have people from China, El Salvador, Italy, and America—it’s a really nice multi-cultural group.
What is your best life hack?
We do not cook at all except on Sundays. Otherwise, it just doesn’t happen. We get home too late, and the kids need to eat before they head off to their evening activities. As long as no one minds eating leftovers, we cook everything on Sundays and then we’re done.
And this might not fall under the ‘life hack’ category, but I have realized that I need to find time to be social. Many years ago, a group of us Highlands School moms went to hear Amy Chua (author of Battle Hymn of The Tiger Mother) speak at The Club. Afterward, we went to AVO for a drink, and it kind of turned into what we now call the After Eight Club. Once a month, we meet around 8:30 p.m. for wine and cheese at someone’s house and just catch up on things.
So do you consider yourself a Tiger Mom like Amy Chua?
No, she was too extreme for me. I think her kids turned out fine, but at what cost? Unless you are going to grow up and be a concert pianist, I don’t think anything is that important that it should take up all of your free time. You only have one chance to be a kid. Maya and Deven each do a lot of things outside of school, and my husband and I practically beg them to give up one or two things. But we do tell them that if they want to take piano or karate, they have to put in 100% effort and practice! If you are going to do something, do it to the best of your ability. Until one of them can drive, it is a lot of work for us too. Monday through Friday, there is something every night. It can be exhausting. And Saturday and Sunday go by way too fast. So, no Tiger Mom for me. But thank you, Amy Chua, for inspiring us to create the After Eight Club!
What do you do when you want to get away from everything?
If I can just get out of the house and feel the sun on my face I’m good. Now, if I want to actually leave the house, I will find a spa somewhere. Ross Bridge is a great escape.
Aside from being a doctor, wife, mother, art collector, and volunteer, tell us one thing you might do better than anyone else you know.
Maybe one thing that I am “the best” at—and you will think I’m so old school—is that I always remember birthdays for immediate and extended family, as well as for my closest friends, with Hallmark cards that get mailed. Younger friends get Halloween and Valentine’s Day cards too. I probably mail anywhere from 60 to 80 cards a year. Birthdays should be recognized, and I feel a card is better than a text, email, or e-card!
Is there one thing people will be surprised to learn you do not know how to do?
I cannot just whip out an Indian food dish! My mom can, but I definitely did not get that from her.